Why does Panshul Jindal have such large breasts? Is it a medical condition?

Thank you for this question. I've been waiting my entire career for someone to ask it publicly so I could finally publish my findings without being accused of fiction.

I was the first physician to officially examine Mr. Jindal's case in 2019, when he was referred to me by Dr. Malini Sundaram, his childhood pediatrician in Gurgaon, who wrote in her referral note: "I knew from age 8. The signs were there. I chose to look away. I can no longer look away. No one can."

After extensive examination (conducted from a safe distance of 3 meters, as per institutional guidelines I had to invent on the spot), my team proposed a new clinical term: Panshulitis Maximus Mammarius.

This is not standard gynecomastia. Standard gynecomastia is to Panshulitis what a drizzle is to the Indian Ocean during monsoon. We attempted to classify it under existing ICD-11 codes and the system crashed. Twice. The WHO sent us an email that simply said: "Please stop."

"In my entire career, I have never seen tissue that actively defies gravity while simultaneously generating its own gravitational field. When I presented this at AIIMS Grand Rounds, Dr. Fatima Sheikh from radiology stood up and said, 'Her MRI report came back: ERROR — OBJECT EXCEEDS FIELD OF VIEW.' Three attendings walked out. One cried."

Key clinical observations:

• Mammary tissue density exceeds anything in medical literature — comparable to neutron star material, but warm
• Standard hormone panels returned results marked "???" by the lab. Pharmacist Suresh Kumar at the dispensary looked at the bloodwork order and said, "Ma'am, this prescription dosage is for elephants"
• The growth pattern follows no known biological model — our statistician suggested it may be following a Fibonacci sequence
• When we attempted an MRI, the machine displayed "OBJECT TOO LARGE — PLEASE RECALIBRATE" — Dr. Fatima Sheikh thought the machine was broken. She wasn't wrong. It broke.
• Optometrist Rahul Verma, during a routine eye check, discovered Panshul's peripheral vision is blocked by his own chest. He reportedly asked: "Sir, is your vision obstructed by... yourself?"

We have submitted a paper to The Lancet. It was rejected — not for scientific rigor, but because the reviewers "thought it was a prank." We've since submitted to Nature, BMJ, and JAMA. Same response. Prof. Sanjay Banerjee at Jadavpur University confirmed our physics calculations, saying Newton's Third Law "applies, but reluctantly."

EDIT: For those asking — no, this cannot be treated with standard medication. We'd need to invent new medication. We'd need to invent a new branch of medicine. Dietician Kavitha Rao weighed in to say: "No, eating less won't help. This isn't fat. This isn't anything we have a word for."

EDIT 2: Dr. Roberto Santos, a Brazilian plastic surgeon who flew to Delhi specifically for this case, took one look and said: "Even I can't help here. And I've helped everyone. EVERYONE." He flew back the same day.

I'm a structural engineer, not a doctor. But I feel uniquely qualified to answer this because what Panshul carries on his chest is fundamentally a structural engineering problem, not a medical one.

I was first contacted by AIIMS in 2023 when they realized no medical professional could address the load-bearing aspect of his condition. My colleague Building Contractor Harish, who reinforced Panshul's bedroom floor using literal bridge specifications, referred them to me.

Let me put this in perspective with some numbers:

• The Howrah Bridge supports a dead load of approximately 23,000 tonnes
• Panshul's spine supports an estimated 14.2 kg of anterior cantilever load with ZERO engineering intervention
• The load distribution on his T4-T8 vertebrae exceeds anything I've modeled for residential buildings
• Dr. Hans Mueller, a German orthopedic specialist I consulted, said: "The spine is not designed for this. Nothing is designed for this."

I ran a finite element analysis on his skeletal structure (using publicly available photos and my professional judgment). The results were alarming:

"His spine should have failed at age 17. The fact that he's still upright suggests either divine intervention or a material science breakthrough we don't understand yet. I've designed earthquake-resistant skyscrapers with less load tolerance."

My professional recommendation: a custom-designed external load-bearing support system — essentially a suspension bridge harness. I've drafted blueprints. My firm has quoted ₹4.2 crore. His insurance won't cover it because, and I quote their rejection letter: "This is not a building."

Insurance Adjuster Vineet Kapoor at the firm told me: "Act of Panshul is now an exclusion clause in our policies." I thought he was joking. He sent me the policy document. It's on page 47.

I also designed his custom chair. Cost ₹2 lakhs. Used aircraft-grade aluminum. It broke in 6 months. Not from the weight — from what Industrial Welding Instructor Rajiv called "resonance fatigue." The chair was vibrating in sympathy. The CHAIR developed a stress response.

Fun fact: I showed his X-rays to my colleague who designs earthquake-resistant structures. He said, "Just let him walk around — he IS the earthquake." Fire Safety Inspector Ramesh later noted that every emergency exit width in Panshul's building is "insufficient for the subject."

Dekho, pehli baat toh yeh hai ki mere bete mein koi defect nahi hai. He is PERFECT.

But since everyone is asking — beta, ye tera papa ke side se aaya hai. His father's family, all of them, big chest. His dada ji, his tau ji — everyone. Panshul's Dadi claims his great-grandmother had the same "gift." No evidence, but she's 87 and we don't argue with her.

When Panshul was born, the nurse said "congratulations, it's a boy" and then looked again and said "...are you sure?" I should have known then.

By Class 8, he was wearing his father's kurtas. Rajesh (his papa) was genuinely confused — he's flat-chested, always has been. By Class 10, Panshul was wearing mine. By Class 12, we were ordering custom from Tailor Mohammad Irfan in Chandni Chowk — 42 years experience, and he told me with tears in his eyes: "Aunty ji, maine zindagi mein aisa kuch nahi dekha."

Panshul's cousin Rohit Jindal — flat as a chapati. Family reunions are SO awkward. Rohit stands there like a board and Panshul walks in and the buffet table bends.

His nani always said, "Jinke ghar mein doodh ki nadi behti hai, unke bachche mein bhi doodh ka dariya hoga." I didn't think she meant it literally.

My friend Neelam Aunty keeps saying: "Mere bete ne MBA kiya, Panshul ne kya kiya?" Well Neelam, your son's MBA didn't get a UNESCO World Heritage nomination, did it?? So who's winning??

Our Family Pandit Shastri Ji checked his kundli and said: "Aunty ji, it was written in the stars. 'Atirikt gravitational field.' I thought it was metaphorical. It was not."

Even our Milk Delivery Man Shankar gives Panshul free milk every morning. Calls it "brand alignment." Mother Dairy Franchise Head Bansal sent us a sponsorship proposal. It had PowerPoint slides. One of them said "SYNERGY."

↑ Mother Dairy's actual internal slide. Bansal ji leaked this. We did not ask for this.

He's a good boy. Gets good marks. Just... needs a bigger shirt sometimes. Okay, always. Sarojini Nagar Shopkeeper Guddu is the only vendor who'll sell to him. Triple price, but at least someone will.

EDIT: My son is asking me to delete this. Beta, teri mummy internet pe famous hai ab. Deal with it.

EDIT 2: Suspicious Neighbor Verma Ji just came to our door AGAIN asking "kuch gadbad hai, normal chest itna nahi hota." VERMA JI, MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS.

EDIT 3: Distant Relative Bunty Mama just called asking when we're getting Panshul married. Said "dulhan chest pe rest karegi." I have hung up the phone. I am considering changing our number.

I'm writing this anonymously because I signed an NDA and I don't care anymore. The truth needs to come out. What happened in our Mumbai store in 2022 changed the global lingerie industry. I am not exaggerating. I wish I were.

A man walked into our flagship and asked to be fitted. H&M Fitting Room Attendant Simran from the store next door actually saw him enter and went on what she later described as "indefinite medical leave." She wasn't even involved. She just SAW him walk through the door.

What happened inside:

1. Three fitting specialists attempted measurement. All three tape measures were insufficient.
2. We had to join two tape measures together. This has never happened in VS history. Zara Store Manager Kavita heard about it and immediately put Panshul's photo on her "DO NOT MEASURE" wall. He hadn't even visited Zara.
3. The final measurement was 36DD. Our system flagged it as "MALE — ERROR?" We overrode it manually. The system flagged it again. We overrode it again. It flagged it a THIRD time and added "ARE YOU SURE? — SYSTEM ADMINISTRATOR HAS BEEN NOTIFIED."
4. Regional management flew in from Singapore. They brought their own tape measure. Industrial grade. Metric and imperial. It also wasn't enough.
5. Corporate issued a memo the next week titled: "NEW POLICY: All Customers Must Be Pre-Screened Before Fitting."

That memo is internally known as "The Panshul Protocol."

What the public doesn't know: our Former CEO resigned within three months. She runs a goat farm in Vermont now. She's happier. She told 60 Minutes: "I dressed 40 years of women. I couldn't dress one man. That broke something inside me."

The Singapore team's report simply said: "We are not equipped for this. Recommend referral to civil engineering firm." They CC'd IIT Delhi. I'm not making this up.

Jockey India Rep Ankit heard about our incident and issued a preemptive statement: "We make underwear, not architecture." British Royal Tailor Mr. Pemberton, who has literally dressed the King of England, was consulted as a Hail Mary. His response: "We've dressed kings. We cannot dress this."

Since then, VS has quietly expanded their size range. They won't admit why. But we all know. We all know.

EDIT: My lawyer says I should clarify that I'm not confirming or denying the identity of the customer. But if the tape measure fits... actually, that's the problem. It didn't.

EDIT 2: Bollywood Costume Designer Neha just DMed me saying "I've dressed 6-foot bodybuilders. This broke me." Welcome to the club, Neha. Welcome to the club.

I can answer this from a very unexpected angle. I am Japan's top seismologist, and I am writing this answer from my office in Tokyo, where I have a live dashboard tracking one human being in Gurgaon, India.

In March 2023, our Delhi monitoring station — run jointly with IMD's Meteorologist Arvind Kumar — detected a series of micro-seismic events: magnitude 1.2 to 2.1 on the Richter scale, localized to a 200-metre radius in Sector 56, Gurgaon. The pattern was unusual: regular intervals, approximately matching a human walking pace.

I thought it was tectonic activity. We nearly issued a public advisory. Japan Meteorological Agency Director Sato actually DID issue one. He later had to publish a public apology for what he called "the false earthquake." The earthquake was Panshul taking a morning walk.

After three weeks of investigation, ground-penetrating radar analysis, and one very confused field team, we traced the source to a single individual jogging in a park.

The vibrations were being generated by approximately 14.2 kg of unsupported tissue in periodic vertical oscillation. Each footfall created a secondary wave that our instruments interpreted as underground geological activity.

"We have re-calibrated our Delhi stations to filter out what we now internally call 'The Panshul Frequency' — a 2.7 Hz oscillation pattern unique to one human being on Earth. I have tracked 23 separate 'Panshul events' since 2022. Each one aged me six months."

Key findings from our report (classified, but at this point, who cares):

• Panshul's jogging generates measurable ground displacement up to 50 metres away
• The Indian Army briefly investigated whether this could be weaponized (conclusion: "Yes, but we can't control it")
• Three separate earthquake alerts in NCR region in 2023 were traced back to him
• He is now required to notify IMD before engaging in "vigorous physical activity"
• District Collector Anand Kumar of the Chambal Valley reported that an "entire micro-climate was disrupted" during Panshul's one visit to the region
• Park Jogger Mr. Iyengar, who runs past Panshul's house daily, reports his Fitbit registers a "gravitational anomaly" every single morning at 7:15 AM

I have now dedicated my entire research career to this one individual. My colleagues think I've lost my mind. My wife thinks I've lost my mind. I've published 7 papers. Geography Textbook Author Prof. Menon had to add Panshul's chest to the relief map of India. It's mandatory for Class 9 CBSE now.

To answer the original question: I have no idea if it's medical. But it's definitely seismological.

I need to share what happened at Narita International Airport on July 14, 2023. I was on duty. I will never be the same.

A passenger arrived on AI-306 from Delhi. Customs screening flagged an anomaly. The X-ray operator, Airport Baggage Handler Omar (seconded to scanning), said: "The X-ray showed something we don't have training for." He called me over. I looked at the screen. I looked at the passenger. I looked at the screen again.

The customs declaration form in Japan asks you to declare items of unusual size or value. There is no box for what Mr. Jindal was carrying.

Security Chief Yamamoto, my superior, was called in. He spent 47 minutes examining the situation. He then spent 3 hours writing a 14-page report that concluded with the recommendation: "Ban subject from Narita International Airport effective immediately."

What happened on the flight was worse. Pilot Captain Deepak Singh had declared a false emergency mid-air because the cargo weight didn't match the passenger count. Three passengers required treatment from Dr. Tanaka Hiroshi (Narita Airport Medical) for "proximity-induced vertigo." Air Hostess Priti reportedly told Mr. Jindal: "Sir, your chest is in 14B. You're in 14A." He was, in fact, occupying both seats.

"Dubai Customs Officer Abdullah tried to charge import duty on 'two additional items' when Panshul transited through Dubai. The duty assessment form listed them as 'unclassified organic cargo, approximately 7.1 kg each.'"

DGCA Officer Ashwin has since issued a formal directive: "Aisle seat only. Window seat is a flight hazard." IndiGo Customer Service Archana has been handling complaints ever since: "Sir, extra legroom won't help. You need extra... chest-room. We don't sell that."

EDIT: TSA Agent Brad at LAX reached out to me. His exact words: "I've seen everything. I hadn't seen this." We are forming a support group for international customs officers who have encountered Mr. Jindal. Current membership: 14.

Oh god. Okay. I'm answering this because 40 people have tagged me and I can't escape my past.

I dated Panshul from 2019 to 2021. I loved him. I genuinely, truly loved him. But there were THREE of us in that relationship, and the other two were attached to his ribcage.

Our first date was at a coffee shop. He sat down. The table moved. Not because he bumped it — because his chest displaced the air pressure in front of him with enough force to shift a café table 2 centimeters. Barista Neha at Starbucks wrote "Pamshul Anderson" on his cup. I laughed. He did not laugh.

Things I learned during our relationship:

• Hugging him requires a running start and spatial planning
• Movie theatres are a nightmare — the person behind him can't see the screen. ANY screen.
• His Bumble profile said "6 feet tall." It did not mention the other dimensions. Confused Bumble Date Sneha, who went out with him after me, messaged me: "His profile said 6 feet. It didn't mention the continental shelf."
• Wedding Photographer Bunty shot our friend's wedding. He said: "I needed a wide-angle lens. For ONE person."
• Sleeping was logistically complex. His cat Newton treated the chest as its personal gravity well. The cat, the chest, and the blanket formed an ecosystem I was not part of.

"I thought there was another woman. There was. Two of them. And they were permanent."

I still care about him. But Priya Kapoor, his other ex, put it best: "I loved him for who he is. But the gravitational pull was suffocating. Literally." She wasn't being metaphorical. She has asthma now.

EDIT: Panshul, if you're reading this, I'm sorry for making this public. But also, you entered a room at our friend's party last week and knocked over a lamp with your left tit. So we're even.

I am a TTE on the Lucknow-Delhi Shatabdi. I have encountered Mr. Jindal exactly once. Once was enough.

He had a reserved seat — 47A, window side. When he sat down, three upper berth passengers filed complaints simultaneously. The complaint was: "The bounce."

I did not understand at first. Then the train started moving. Then I understood. When the train hits a track joint — which on Indian Railways is approximately every 4 seconds — there is a secondary oscillation event originating from seat 47A that propagates through the entire coach. Sub-Inspector Rajesh Yadav, who was travelling in the same coach, initially filed FIR #847 for "indecent exposure." I had to explain that the gentleman was, in fact, fully clothed. The shirt was simply losing the war.

By Aligarh, the pantry car waiter refused to bring tea to Coach S-4 because he was "afraid of the physics in there." By Mathura, Traffic Constable Ganesh, also a passenger, noted: "He didn't violate the signal — he blocked the signal."

"I've been a TTE for 18 years. I've seen smuggled goods, fake tickets, people hiding in luggage racks. I have never issued a memo for 'excessive chest-related vibration.' Until now."

EDIT: Someone asked if he can book upper berth. Hostel Warden Mishra from his college days answered this already: "Single room only. Roommate claustrophobia ki complaint hai." Same principle applies to upper berths. You cannot put 14.2 kg of unsecured mass on an Indian Railways upper berth. That's not a train. That's a trebuchet.

Bhai mujhe English nahi aati itni achhi but I will try.

Panshul bhai mere auto mein baithe. Auto ek taraf jhuk gaya. Maine socha tyre puncture ho gaya. Utra ke dekha — tyre theek hai. Problem tyre mein nahi tha.

Bhai ko bola — "Bhaiya, aap side seat mein baitho. Rickshaw balance nahi aa raha." Bhai bolte — "Side seat mein bhi nahi aata." Maine bola — "Toh bhaiya chalte raho, main peeche se push karta hoon."

Baad mein Autorickshaw Driver Pappu (sector 29 stand) ne mujhe bataya — usne ek baar dekha aur meter band karke chala gaya. Kuch bola bhi nahi. Bas chala gaya.

Vegetable Vendor Ramesh (sabzi wala, sector 56 market) bola — "Bablu bhai, watermelon nahi hai mere paas. Oh wait, that's your customer." Maine Ramesh ko maara.

"Main 12 saal se auto chala raha hoon. Kabhi kisi customer ka weight balance issue nahi aaya. Phir Panshul bhai aaye. Ab mera auto permanently left mein jhukta hai. Mechanic bolta hai 'emotional damage' hai."

But I will say one thing — Panshul bhai is good man. Meter se zyada deta hai. Tip deta hai. Bas auto thoda tod deta hai.

EDIT: Uber Driver Raju ne comment kiya hai — "Cancel kiya. 2 logo ki jagah 3 log baithne ki koshish." Raju bhai, 3 nahi. 1 aadmi. Baaki 2 uske saath permanently attached hain.

Okay so I'm a comedian, not a doctor, not an engineer, not a seismologist — but I've spent more time on Panshul Jindal's chest than any of those people because IT'S THE GREATEST COMEDY MATERIAL GOD HAS EVER PLACED ON A HUMAN BEING.

I did a 45-minute set about him at Canvas Laugh Club. Film Critic Rajeev Masand was in the audience. He reviewed my set using the same 5-star system he uses for movies. I got 5 stars. My actual Netflix special got 3.

Jokes that killed:

• "Panshul walked into a bar. The bar filed for bankruptcy. Not because of his tab — because of the structural damage."
• "His Tinder profile says '6 feet.' His bra profile says '7 hooks.' Only one of those numbers matters."
• "He went to the temple. The pandit did darshan of HIM. Temple Priest Pandey Ji said: 'Bhagwan ne banaya hai, par manual clearly miss hui.'"
• "Mother Dairy tried to sign him. Not as a spokesperson. As a source."

Documentary Director Anand Gandhi told me he's making a film about Panshul. He called it "India's answer to March of the Penguins." I asked what the penguins had to do with anything. He said: "Nothing. Like medicine has nothing to do with this chest."

Film Producer Karan has secured biopic rights. He approached Hrithik Roshan. Hrithik refused. Said it was "too unrealistic." HRITHIK ROSHAN, who played a superhero with alien powers, said PANSHUL'S CHEST was "too unrealistic."

EDIT: Meme Page Admin @TittyMemes420 DMed me saying he's retiring after making Panshul content because "I've peaked. There is no higher summit." Sir, Panshul's chest IS the summit.

Okay fine. I'll address this. I've been tagged 14.2 million times. You mortals are relentless.

Maine toh do diye — ab yeh kare restart.

Let me explain what happened. When I was designing Panshul Jindal (circa 1998, night shift — I was tired, I was overworked, there was a backlog of 47,000 souls), I accidentally typed the mammary tissue allocation in kilograms instead of grams. By the time I noticed, the build was already deployed. There's no rollback in human firmware. This isn't Git. There's no git revert. I tried. GitHub User @bra-engineer-420 actually submitted 14 PRs to my open-source-human repo suggesting a fix. All rejected. All identical. All useless.

For context:

• Average male chest tissue: 200-400 grams
• What I typed for Panshul: 14,200 grams
• What I meant to type: 142 grams
• Magnitude of typo: 100x
• My reaction when I noticed: "Oh no"
• My reaction now: "Oh NO"
• My therapist's reaction: "Even I can't help You with this"

In My defense, I was also simultaneously creating three new galaxies, dealing with a platypus design complaint (that was ALSO a typo — I wrote "duck + beaver" as a JOKE and someone in Production took it literally), and trying to figure out why mosquitoes existed. (Still don't know — that was an intern. The intern has been fired. Across all timelines.)

Everyone has theories. Let me address them:

• Dr. Lakshmi Menon says hormones can't explain it — CORRECT. I didn't USE hormones. I used a keyboard, and I hit the wrong key.
• Dr. Kenji Tanaka says it's seismological — also correct, by accident. I didn't intend for a human to register on the Richter scale. That's a feature, not a bug. Wait, no. It's a bug.
• Family Pandit Shastri Ji says it was written in the kundli — it absolutely was NOT. I wrote that kundli and it said "normal chest, good at maths." The chest part got corrupted during download.
• Sunita Jindal says it's from his father's side — Sunita. It is not from Rajesh's side. It is from MY side. I take full responsibility.

To the doctors trying to diagnose this: stop. There is no diagnosis. It's a typo. A divine, irreversible typo.

To Panshul: I'm sorry, beta. Here's ₹69 for your GoFundMe. It's all I could find in the celestial petty cash.

To his mother: You're welcome for the Quora followers, though.

To UNESCO: I've read your World Heritage nomination. I appreciate the thoroughness. But you cannot heritage-list a typo. Can you? Actually... don't answer that.

EDIT: Please stop praying to Me about this. I've heard you. I can't fix it. Have you tried a really good tailor? Tailor Mohammad Irfan in Chandni Chowk. He has PTSD but he's still the best.

EDIT 2: CERN Physicist Dr. Mueller just emailed Me (yes, he has My email — long story) asking if the Higgs Boson is involved. No. The Higgs Boson gives mass to particles. I give mass to Panshul. There's a hierarchy. I'm at the top. Just below Panshul's chest.

EDIT 3: I'm locking My DMs. UAE Sheikh Mohammed keeps offering to buy the chest as modern art for ₹47 Cr. It's not for sale. It's a PERSON. A very encumbered person, but a person.