🟢 #OpenToWork — Brand Deals, UNESCO Nominations, Structural Consulting
Panshul Jindal
🥇 LinkedIn Top VoiceChest Influencer | Category 5 Chest Event | UNESCO Heritage Candidate | Gravity's Most Wanted | Former Victoria's Secret Stress Test Subject (involuntary)
📍 New Delhi, India · Registered across two postal codes · Contact info
14,200 connections · 47M followers
IIT Moob-bay (Honorary) · 847+ mutual connections including Mother Dairy CEO, Lloyd's of London, and USGS Seismology Division
About
🏔️ I'm Panshul Jindal, and my chest has its own gravitational field.
What started as a genetic gift (or curse, depending on who you ask — my tailor says curse, my brand manager says gift) has become a full-time career. My chest has been:
• 📊 Measured by 3 separate physics departments
• ✈️ Banned from international airports (3 and counting)
• 📰 Featured in 847 news articles across 42 countries
• 🔬 The subject of a peer-reviewed paper (cited 847 times)
• 💰 Valued at ₹14.2 crore by Lloyd's of London (insured)
• 🏛️ Under consideration for UNESCO Intangible Cultural Heritage status
I believe in radical chest transparency. In a world that tells men to hide their assets, I strap on a bra and hit the slopes. That's not just snowboarding — that's activism.
Currently seeking: Brand partnerships (dairy preferred), speaking engagements (stages must be reinforced), and a bra that lasts more than 72 hours.
DMs open for serious inquiries only. Victoria's Secret legal team: please use the official channel.
#ChestInfluencer #Category5 #JindalConstant #GravityDisruptor #BraIndustry #MotherDairy #UNESCO #14point2kg #OpenToWork
Featured
📰
"One Man's Chest Is Disrupting the Global Textile Industry"
The Economic Times · 847K views
🔬
Research Paper: "Anomalous Gravitational Mammary Dynamics"
Journal of Applied Physics · Cited 847 times
🎬
TEDx Talk: "The Weight of Authenticity (Literally)"
TEDx Mumbai · 14.2M views
📺
"Seena: The Untold Story" — Official Trailer
IMDb · Rating: 8.4/10
Activity
47,000,000 followers · Posts every time a bra breaks
Took my chest to the slopes today. 🏔️
People asked why I wore a bra snowboarding. The real question is: why doesn't EVERYONE with 14.2 kg of chest wear structural support during high-velocity alpine descent?
Safety isn't gendered. Physics doesn't care about your gender norms. Gravity comes for us all — it just comes for me harder.
To the ski patrol who asked me to sign a liability waiver "for the mountain": I appreciate your professionalism.
To Victoria's Secret, who slid into my DMs asking me to take this down: No. ❤️
To Mother Dairy: Call me. You know why.
#Authenticity #ChestDay #EveryDay #Category5 #BraLife #SkiSeason #GravityIsJustASuggestion
📊 47,000,000 impressions · 847,000 reactions · 142,000 comments · 28,400 reposts
🏆 Most viewed LinkedIn post in India (2024) · Second most viewed globally (after someone quitting Goldman Sachs)
847,000 · 142,000 comments · 28,400 reposts
Experience
🧑💼
Independent Mammary Consultant
Self-Employed · Full-time
Jan 2020 – Present · 4 yrs
New Delhi, India (and two adjacent postal codes)
- Providing expert consultation on chest-related gravitational anomalies to physics departments, textile manufacturers, and confused airport security personnel worldwide
- Developed the "Jindal Framework" for assessing mammary load-bearing requirements, now used by 14 garment manufacturers
- Client list includes Victoria's Secret (involuntary), Mother Dairy (pending), UNESCO (under review), and Lloyd's of London (insured)
- Generated ₹14.2 crore in insurance claims for the bra industry (unintentionally)
✈️
Seismic Event Generator
Various International Airports · Contract
Jun 2022 – Present · 2 yrs (intermittent, due to bans)
Narita (banned), Heathrow (suspended), IGI Delhi (on notice)
- Triggered metal detectors, body scanners, and existential crises at 3 major international airports
- Caused the first-ever evacuation of Narita Terminal 2 due to a "non-explosive structural anomaly"
- TSA file is reportedly 847 pages long
- Personally responsible for the implementation of a new security screening category: "Mammary Event — Non-Hostile"
- Heathrow security chief described the experience as "the most confusing 45 minutes of my 30-year career"
👙
Product Stress Tester
Victoria's Secret · Involuntary
Mar 2023 – Mar 2023 · 45 min (14 bras)
Mumbai Flagship Store (now reinforced)
- Tested 14 products in 45 minutes during a routine shopping visit
- All 14 products experienced catastrophic structural failure
- Results led to emergency board meeting at VS HQ (Columbus, Ohio)
- Internal VS memo subsequently classified this visit as a "Jindal-class Event"
- Involuntarily contributed to the creation of "The Jindal Standard" — VS's highest product integrity benchmark
- Still waiting for my consulting invoice to be paid (₹14.2 lakh, 847 days overdue)
🏔️
Alpine Structural Integrity Demonstrator
Gulmarg Ski Resort · Freelance
Dec 2023 – Feb 2024 · Seasonal
Gulmarg, Kashmir
- Demonstrated that bra technology can function at altitude, sub-zero temperatures, and 60+ km/h velocity
- Photo from this engagement went viral (47M LinkedIn impressions, 2.4K Reddit upvotes, one research paper)
- Ski patrol created a new incident code: "MAMMARY-5" (Category 5 Chest Event on Active Slope)
- Avalanche team confirmed chest was not the cause of the avalanche (probably)
Education
🎓
IIT Moob-bay
Honorary Doctorate in Applied Mammary Physics
2024 (Conferred in absentia — the convocation hall couldn't accommodate)
Thesis: "On the Upper Bounds of Textile Elasticity: A Personal Journey"
Faculty advisor resigned during review, citing "I didn't go to IIT for this"
Activities: Founded the Chest Awareness Society, organized first-ever "Bra Olympics" (event cancelled after Day 1)
📚
University of Life
B.Sc. in Existing with a 14.2 kg Chest
1997 – Present (ongoing)
Specialization: Surviving, Thriving, and Breaking Bras
Extracurriculars: Gravity (fighting it), Physics (rewriting it), Tailors (traumatizing them)
Skills
Gravitational Field Generation
🎓
🔬
👥
+14,200
Underwire Destruction
👙
💼
+8,470
Airport Evacuation
✈️
🚨
+4,200
Bra Industry Disruption
🥛
📈
+6,847
Seismic Activity (Chest-Derived)
🌍
📊
+3,142
Brand Disruption (Unintentional)
🛡️
+2,847
Recommendations
Received (847) · Given (0 — too busy)
"In 40 years of dairy industry experience, I've never seen natural storage capacity of this magnitude. We need this man on our board. I've said it at every shareholder meeting since February and they keep telling me to 'stay on topic.' I will not stay on topic."
"I've been a spinal surgeon for 25 years. When I examined Panshul's X-rays, I called three colleagues because I thought the machine was broken. It was not broken. His spine is simply operating at parameters we didn't know were possible. He should be studied. Respectfully."
"Lloyd's of London has insured the Crown Jewels, Tina Turner's legs, and Bruce Springsteen's voice. None of those policies generated as many actuarial meetings as Panshul Jindal's chest. We've assigned a dedicated team. They need therapy but they're coping."
"My sewing machine hasn't been the same since. I wake up at night hearing the sound of snapping thread. But I am proud. What we built together was not just a bra — it was a monument to human stubbornness. Panshul, you owe me 14 needles and my peace of mind."
Licenses & certifications
🏛️
UNESCO Intangible Cultural Heritage — Application Pending
UNESCO · Filed March 2024
Category: "Living Human Treasure — Anomalous Physiological Heritage"
🛡️
Lloyd's of London — Insured Asset Certificate
Lloyd's of London · Jan 2024
Policy #JIN-142-847 · Insured value: ₹14.2 Crore · Coverage: "Acts of Chest"
🚫
International Airport Ban Certificate (×3)
Various Aviation Authorities · 2022-2024
Narita (permanent), Heathrow (under review), IGI Delhi (negotiating)