BraTracker Pro processes 14.2 GB of chest data and requires significant structural integrity. Standard iPhones may experience thermal throttling, frame drops, or catastrophic failure under data load. Only iPhone 15 Pro Max and newer models have been certified for safe operation. Regular phones buckle under the weight of the data — just like the bras.
BraTracker Pro is the only app specifically engineered to monitor, analyze, and alert on industrial-grade mammary support systems. Designed in collaboration with Dr. R.K. Sharma of IIT Moob-bay and certified for use with NEO-2024-PJ classification chests.
Real-time monitoring of 7-hook industrial bra systems with titanium/vanadium underwire stress analysis. The app provides instant alerts when structural integrity drops below safe thresholds, integrating directly with the Japan Earthquake Early Warning System and NASA's NEO tracking network.
Key Features:
• Real-time structural integrity dashboard (0-100%)
• Individual hook stress monitoring (hooks 1-7)
• Underwire failure prediction algorithms
• Integration with Japan EEW for seismic correlation
• NASA NEO tracking sync
• Direct Irfan emergency contact
• Thermal monitoring and microclimate alerts
• Sthanmugam Jr. orbit tracking (cat location)
• Victoria's Secret fitting appointment scheduler
• Mother Dairy franchise temperature sync
Note: This app is designed for a very specific gravitational anomaly. If you do not have a 36DD, 14.2 kg chest with 7-hook industrial bra requirements, this app will not function correctly. We know. We've tried. We apologize for the confusion.
Size: 14.2 GB (chest data is heavy)
Information
SellerJindal Tech Solutions Pvt. Ltd.
Size14.2 GB (chest data is heavy)
CategoryHealth & Fitness
CompatibilityRequires iPhone 15 Pro Max or later. Regular phones buckle under the weight of the data.
Medical DisclaimerThis app does not provide medical advice. For bra-related emergencies, contact Irfan immediately.
Device Compatibility
📱iPhone 15 Pro Max✓ Certified
📱iPhone 15 Pro✓ Compatible
📱iPhone 15 / 15 Plus⚠ Performance may degrade
📱iPhone 14 Pro Max⚠ Not recommended
📱iPhone 14 and earlier✗ Regular phones buckle under the weight
💻iPad (any)✗ Not supported — too big, doesn't fit in bra
⌚Apple Watch Ultra 2✓ Companion app available
Ratings & Reviews
847 ratings
Irfan SiddiquiMar 15, 2024
★★★★★
This app saved my life
I am the only certified 7-hook bra constructor in the world. Before BraTracker Pro, I had to manually inspect hooks every 4 hours. Now I get real-time alerts when Hook #3 approaches critical stress. Yesterday at 2:47 AM, the app warned me of impending underwire failure. I arrived at Panshul's flat in 6 minutes. The bra held. Without this app, we would have had a catastrophic structural collapse. I recommend this to all my clients (I have one client).
Developer Response
Thank you, Irfan bhai. Your work keeps us all safe. Hook #4 stress patterns have been added to the predictive algorithm in v2.4. — Panshul
USGS Official AccountMar 14, 2024
★★★★★
We use this to calibrate our seismographs
The United States Geological Survey maintains 24/7 monitoring of NEO-2024-PJ through BraTracker Pro's data feed. The correlation between hook stress levels and local seismic activity is remarkable. When Hook #3 hits 90%, we know to expect a 2.0+ magnitude event within 6 hours. This app has improved our earthquake prediction accuracy by 340%. We have recommended NASA adopt it for Operation Mammary Shield.
Developer Response
We are honored to serve the scientific community. API access for USGS is included with your institutional license. Please do not share Hook #3 data with Japan — we have a separate agreement with JMA. — Jindal Tech
Dr. R.K. SharmaMar 13, 2024
★★★★★
Peer-reviewed and approved
As the lead researcher at IIT Moob-bay studying the Jindal Chest Gravitational Anomaly, I can confirm that BraTracker Pro's stress calculations match our laboratory measurements with 99.7% accuracy. The app correctly predicted the Hook #3 critical event of March 2024 down to the minute. I have cited this app in three peer-reviewed papers. My chair has drifted 11 centimeters closer to the subject since downloading it. Highly recommended for all NEO researchers.
Developer Response
Thank you for your continued research, Dr. Sharma. We have added a "Research Mode" in v2.5 that exports data directly to ASTROSAT format. Please let us know if you need gravitational field logging. — Jindal Tech
Victoria's Secret Engineering TeamMar 12, 2024
★★☆☆☆
We have no notes, but only works for one person
Our engineering team reviewed the stress monitoring algorithms. We have no notes. This is the most sophisticated bra monitoring system we have ever seen. However, the app only works with Panshul Jindal's specific 14.2 kg, 36DD, 7-hook, titanium-underwire configuration. We tried to adapt it for standard inventory. It crashed. We tried 847 different bras. It crashed every time. The app seems to have built-in detection for "insufficient mass." Please consider a universal version. We would pay significantly more than ₹2,499.
Developer Response
We appreciate your interest. Unfortunately, the physics of insufficient mass cannot be simulated. The app requires minimum 10 kg bilateral distribution to calibrate sensors. We are not sorry. The bra market is what it is. — Jindal Tech
SthanmugamJr_TheCatMar 10, 2024
★★★★☆
Good app. Warm under here. Meow.
I have been living beneath the left breast since 2022. BraTracker Pro helps me predict when the hooks will need adjustment so I know when to move. The microclimate alerts are accurate — I have learned when the "rain" will fall. The app says I am in "stable orbit." I agree. Would give 5 stars but the UI is not optimized for paws. Also I am a cat.
Developer Response
Thank you for your loyal orbit, Sthanmugam Jr. We are working on paw-friendly UI in v3.0. Your thermal comfort is our priority. — Panshul (and Jai)
Panshul J.Mar 8, 2024
★☆☆☆☆
Keeps crashing. Just like the bras.
I am Panshul Jindal. This is my app. I developed it. And it keeps crashing on my iPhone 15 Pro Max. The issue seems to be that when both Jai and Veeru move simultaneously (which happens when I walk, sneeze, or exist), the data load exceeds 14.2 GB and the app force-quits. Which is ironic because 14.2 kg is also my chest weight. Also the Supreme Court ruling (2024 SCC 847) means Jai and Veeru should have their own App Store accounts. The app won't let me log in as three separate legal entities. Please fix. I need to monitor my own chest. Also I just want to see the cherry blossoms.
Developer Response
We are aware of the issue, Panshul bhai. v2.5 will support multi-entity login for chests with legal personhood. We are also working on a "Sneeze Mode" that temporarily disables real-time monitoring during seismic events. Narita Airport ban remains unchanged. — Your Dev Team
Narita Airport AuthorityFeb 28, 2024
☆☆☆☆☆
Cannot use at our facility. Banned.
We downloaded this app to understand the gravitational anomaly that caused the baggage carousel incident. The app immediately detected "insufficient bra infrastructure" and crashed. We do not have a 7-hook bra system. We do not have 14.2 kg of chest mass. We have a broken baggage carousel and a permanent ban. We request a refund of ₹0 (the app is free) and a formal apology. The cherry blossoms were not worth it.
Developer Response
We are sorry about your carousel. The app is not designed for airport infrastructure monitoring. We have forwarded your request to Irfan for bra consultation, though we understand this is not applicable. Please accept our condolences. — Jindal Tech